Talk Angling fishing chat and tackle advice
Arcade |Home | About Us | Contact Us | BLOGS | Register
Quick Member Login:
Forgot password?
Forum Sponsors:
Google Adverts:

Forum Statistics:
Forum Members: 4,699
Total Threads: 7,489
Total Posts: 52,350


There are 433 users
currently browsing forums.
You don't appear to be registered. Click here to register
Search the forums:
Old 21st August 2006, 05:01 PM   #1 (permalink)
polepot
3rd time lucky ;)
Talk Angling Life Member
 
polepot's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Leigh
Posts: 1,875
Send a message via MSN to polepot Send a message via Yahoo to polepot Send a message via Skype™ to polepot
Unhappy Married Life

So why is that most married couples will get a self reflective chuckle out of this story?


A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very

much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old

buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the

refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12

different countries.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could

think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... you know...

they have frozen glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted Him

by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer

mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just

holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at The

bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't

be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took

out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in

blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips.

"But my sweet honey.. at the bar....you know there's swearing, dirty

words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?.. "LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT, SIT YOUR

ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT

YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR!

THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?"



....and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story.
polepot is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21st August 2006, 06:27 PM   #2 (permalink)
ridgeacre
Talk Angling Senior Member
Talk Angling Life Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: West Bromwich
Posts: 1,025
Default

Thats big trouble
ridgeacre is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 28th May 2008, 07:40 AM   #3 (permalink)
SUMO
coton cons. biggest match weight 218lb
Senior Member
 
SUMO's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: nuneaton warwickshire
Posts: 389
Default

if i had a wife like that she would feel the back of my hand
SUMO is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th May 2008, 11:53 AM   #4 (permalink)
jethro
Talk Angling Senior Member
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Sheffield
Posts: 435
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SUMO View Post
if i had a wife like that she would feel the back of my hand
are you sure.
jethro is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th May 2008, 04:57 PM   #5 (permalink)
justin case
Southern Mo:
Talk Angling Life Member
 
justin case's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Waltham Abbey, Essex
Posts: 768
Blog Entries: 12
Default

OK Im stuck on one item from the above

what the hell is a pig in a blanket ?

It sure isnt southern food
justin case is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th May 2008, 05:00 PM   #6 (permalink)
jeff
Talk Angling Senior Member
Talk Angling Life Member
 
jeff's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Oldbury. West Midlands.
Posts: 797
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SUMO View Post
if i had a wife like that she would feel the back of my hand
With her mouth she'd probably kick you in the nuts
__________________
Therapy's expensive..Go fishing.
jeff is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 30th May 2008, 07:20 PM   #7 (permalink)
carpcrazy
Registered Club Member
Trusted Angler
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 92
Talking

i love it,sounds a bit like my wife, only jokin she aint that bad.
carpcrazy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30th May 2008, 07:33 PM   #8 (permalink)
sumo's wife
BEAT SUMO 4 TIMES NOW :-)
Done a Ton
 
sumo's wife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: with sumo
Posts: 131
Default

Sumo did say 'if' he had a wife like that...............I'm not like that!
If he says he wants to go out without me I show HIM the back of MY hand

Jeff.......when you say ' her mouth' I hope you are not on about ME!

JC...........a pig in blanket...........is a sausage wrapped in a piece of bacon
sumo's wife is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30th May 2008, 07:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
jeff
Talk Angling Senior Member
Talk Angling Life Member
 
jeff's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Oldbury. West Midlands.
Posts: 797
Default

I was on about the woman in the joke, how could anyone say that about you. would you really give Sumo the back of your hand ?
__________________
Therapy's expensive..Go fishing.
jeff is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 30th May 2008, 07:46 PM   #10 (permalink)
sumo's wife
BEAT SUMO 4 TIMES NOW :-)
Done a Ton
 
sumo's wife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: with sumo
Posts: 131
Default

Of course i would
sumo's wife is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT. The time now is 08:50 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.0.0 Site copyright TalkAngling.co.uk 2000 - 2008
Skin Purchased from CompletevB