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Old 2nd February 2008, 09:47 PM   #1 (permalink)
polepot
barbel less no more, cheers bbq ;)
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Default marriage

#CASE 1
Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

#CASE 2
At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger??" The other replied, "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

#CASE 3
Before a man is married, he is incomplete. Then when he is married, he is finished.

#CASE 4
Marriage is an institution in which a man losses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's status.

#CASE 5
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
married??" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying for it."

#CASE 6
Young son : "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad : "That happens in most countries son."

#CASE 7
Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and then it was too late."

#CASE 8
A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes

#CASE 9
When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. Affair?

#CASE 10
Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.

#CASE 11
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." And the Husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."

#CASE 12
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified : "Wife wanted". The next day, he received hundreds letters. They all said the same thing "You can have mine."

#CASE 13
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or his wife is new.

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Old 2nd February 2008, 11:18 PM   #2 (permalink)
baging up art
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how true that is........lol...
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Old 3rd February 2008, 08:18 AM   #3 (permalink)
compleat tangler
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my marriage is based on love and understanding...............
she doesn't love me and i dont understand her.

you forgot to mention the most dangerous food to a man's health............
wedding cake

i told her i was worried about the size of my manhood........she said 'fancy making a fuss over a little thing like that '

she was like a sex object to me.........i mentioned sex and she objected.

marriage isn't a word ..it's a sentence

etc etc etc etc
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Last edited by compleat tangler : 3rd February 2008 at 08:34 AM.
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Old 3rd February 2008, 01:17 PM   #4 (permalink)
ridgeacre
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some good uns there mate.


Marriage is like an institution anybody that does should be in one
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Old 3rd February 2008, 02:54 PM   #5 (permalink)
rive t
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How can anyone put a thread on a fishing forum called marriage.

The two do not go together
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Old 3rd February 2008, 05:10 PM   #6 (permalink)
jacks
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And who say's you lot are so perfect either....

1. Men are like .. Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like.Bananas . The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like .... Blenders You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like .. Chocolate Bars . Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ..Commercials ....... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like Department Stores . Their clothes are always 1/2 off
8. Men are like ...Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like . ..Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like Snowstorms .... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like ..Lava Lamps Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like Parking Spots All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

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Old 3rd February 2008, 06:23 PM   #7 (permalink)
jethro
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had a word with my beloved she tells me only Jacks tells the truth the rest are rubbish. Must also say I made this statement under duress.
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Old 3rd February 2008, 06:32 PM   #8 (permalink)
richie
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Yeah but jacks , you just know you couldn't do without us . lol . Marriage is like a circus with three rings , the engagement ring , wedding ring and SUFFERING
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