May Carp Vader Competion - Page 2 - Talk Angling fishing chat and tackle advice

Larry Teepot · 7th May 2007, 08:49 AM

there must be a line or two there for me to extract the urine ...but it will refrain as it may be painful for you

polepot · 7th May 2007, 10:50 PM

So what was it malc

Oneabung · 8th May 2007, 09:43 AM

A friend of mine who shall remain nameless had a very similar experience having used shampoo as a lubricant then fell to sleep and woke up the next morning having doubled in size but in much pain!

Ashfield Dave · 8th May 2007, 02:58 PM

The funniest thing i ever saw while fishing happened a few years ago at Little Bleakhills Fishery near Mansfield.
It was a bitterly cold January day and there was only one fisherman and myself on the lake, we were catching small roach quite regular so it kept us busy, a car pulled up, a bloke gets out and lets himself through the gate and walks up to the guy on the next platform to me, he enquires how its fishing before explaining that he's just come back from the Trent, where he spent 3 hours freezing and no bites, on the way back he got a flat tyre and had to change the wheel, a few miles further on he got stopped by the cops for speeding and given a ticket, he was hoping his luck might change here, he walked up to the next platform to have a look, like we all do, but he slipped on the frosty wooden platform and went head first into the pond, my neighbour ran to give him a hand out, the guys face was purple, he didn't say a word, just marched to his car and shot off, me and the other guy could hardly fish after that for laughing.

si cooper · 17th May 2007, 09:44 PM

the day i will never forget
it was a cold wet and windy day and i was fishing a makins id got my brolly up attached to me brolly arm off me box, hadnt had a bite for over an hour so i deided to stand up an stretch me legs an take a leak just as id started to pee in the bush behind me the wind took my brolly an box up in to the air and in to the pool all i could do was watch my box and brolly slowly sinking about 20 yards out in the pool after about 20 min of swearing and cursing myself for been such a plak i went to find the baylif who just shook his head and pointed to this shabby old boat i managed to drag the boat to the pool we was fishig on but couldnt do nothin till the match had finished 2 and a half hours later the wistle blew and i began the mission to rescue my box but the any trouble was i hadnt got any ors all i had was a plak of wood luckerly one of the old boys i was with was on hand an in the boat to help me i started to paddle my way out and just as we got close the wind took us further away at this point the boat was leaking in water bad and we was sinkig no mater how hard i paddled we was just getting further away we reached the other side of the pool and draged the boat back out to empty the water,i was ready for giving up and calling it an expensive day out but the old boy had an idea to use his brolly as a sail and it worked we managed to get me box and me brolly out nealy capsizing the boat though but the any thig was the top of me box had opend and every thin had fell out and is sum wher in the middle of the pool. it was an expensive pee i tell ya and ive learnt a valuble lesson

Nick Brown - Carp Vader · 28th May 2007, 05:45 PM

Only a couple more days left to enter this month's competition. Obviously for the majority of you, your experiences are far too embarrassing to post on here

Brian G · 29th May 2007, 06:17 PM

It must have happened to most of us at some time but my most embarasinging moment ended up with me taking my annual bath in a late November, some 30+ years ago when fishing rivers were in vogue and car heaters were rubbish, I was on a club match at Mucky Meadows Bewdley and having pegged it out was able to advise the members that some of the pegs needed ropes to get down them and that the banks in places were dangerous, no problems then eveyone was aware draw made and off we go, my peg was on the flat well flatish just a gentle slope down to it, so my rope was loaned out to a fellow angler, first down was the creel remember them followed by the bait bag and last was the rod holdall, well not quite last as two steps down the slope i am impersonating Eddie the Eagle as i sped towards the river, no stopping me now just got to go with the flow straight into about six foot of water along with all my gear, well that saved wetting the obligatory brown crumb packed in brown paper bags those days, I eventually scrambled onto the bank after recovering my gear and proceeded to make my way back to the car an old Morris Minor with an heater that barely worked, saw plenty of jokes made at my expense, an hour or so later saw my boot socks dry and a very light weight waterproof suit was just about fit to wear along with an old jumper I am ready to set about bagging, did I? No not a bite was it cold? Yes, not my only bath whilst fishing but certainly the coldest.

polemaster · 29th May 2007, 07:35 PM

Fishing a John Smiths qualifier years ago on a lovely sunny day, pegged near the boards. The public were going about their business, cyclists, dog walkers, joggers, couples, kids, i think you get the picture, it was very busy.
Now the night before a trip to the local curry house was organised, followed by several slimline tonics!
Set up at my peg ready to go, and when i say go i mean go, Gandi had decided he was getting his revenge and a bad case of Deli Belly set in. Not many places to go around the banks in the middle of a park, had to run to my car drive round to the local pubs and hotels, now having visited several local toilets i began to get fed up with driving around Evesham like Mr Schumaker shouting were's the bog.
Now the at the time of this match the in thing to wear on the bank was the good old Stephens of Birmingham green all in one nylon waterproof suit, zips eveywhere, elasticated ankles and wrists, waterproof hood. I was desperate and new i wouldnt make it to any toilets, so had to risk it behind my car parked tight to the hedge, just about made it in time fighting to get the one piece suit off. Now at the end of the match during the weigh in, someone said to me can you smell dog S##t, and to be fair i had smelt s##t all day, but after several checks of shoes fishing luggage nothing was found, packed up loaded the car up, got in the car sat down, then suddenly my neck went slightly moist and sticky, yes i had S##T IN THE BLOODY HOOD OF MY ONE PIECE SUIT, oh and no i didnt qualify in the match.

polepot · 31st May 2007, 02:09 PM

This was my most embarrasing fishing trip

Every year at the end of the season Baz Smith would run a weekend trip to Loch Kenn and 30 of us would trundle up te M6 for 2 or 3 days of long distance feeder fishing and a few beers

This paticular year a few of us went up on the thursday to get a days practise in (fishing and staying up all night in the bar). So on the friday morning we got up as the rest of the lads were arriving, they were tired from the long drive and we were knackered coz of the excessive amounts of beer consumed the night before. After some breakfast the draw was done and off to the water we went. I don't know how many of you have fished Loch Kenn but you have to sit on your platform out in the water. I was sat fishing feeling REALLY rough and the motion of the waves hitting my legs wasn't helping much. Just incase the worst happened I took my two false teeth out and put them in my tray behind me. Luckily I managed to hold on to my brekkie and managed to catch a few decent roach. At the all-out I thought I'd better put me teeth back in before the pee-taking started, was they in my tray where I was sure I had put them? Nope!!!!!!!!
I checked every tray, box and bag I had, my pockets, and even sifted through my g/bait for them. They were nowhere to be seen. After the weigh in me n my mate searched in the water all around my platform, we earched until it was too dark to see anymore. Totally gutted we headed back to the hotel where everyone including the staff cheered and laughed as I walked in.
I spent the rest of the weekend talking behind my hand and avoiding chatting to strangers (especially the opposite sex, not that there are that many females on two legs up there).
At breakfast on sunday morning, the last day, everyone seemed rather quiet, I put this down to alcohol and thought nothing more of it. I sat there waiting for my brekkie and they served everyone but me, anyone who has ever been for a brekkie with me will know that I am a very slow eater and had asked for mine to come early. Eventually the waitress walked towards me with a plate and a massive grin, she put the plate down on he table and sat there with the eggs and bacon was my teeth smiling at me

. The whole room cheered and clapped and laughed, even the hotel staff were in on the joke

Apparently the 'mate' who helped me look for them pinched them during the match

I don't know if I was mad because he let me suffer all weekend or just relieved to get them back.

devilfisher3 · 1st June 2007, 08:39 AM

my most embarrasing moment in fishing happened to me in irelard a few years ago. having been fishing on derryvonny all day without so much as a bite, i decided to set up a rod and do a spot of lure fishing for pike and perch. i am not the most experienced lure fisherman in the world, so it took me a while to get set up. i reeled in my feeder rod and tidied up a bit around my peg and then walked a few yards down the bank where it looked a bit more pikey. after a few short casts, i decided to give the lure a real whack out. as i was mid cast, a gust of wind put me off, and before i knew what was going on, i had a set of size 12 trebles piercing my scrotum sack! "ouch, that smarts a bit" i said, (or words to that effect anyway). i painfully shuffled back to the swim that my dad was fishing. he burst out laughing! he wasnt laughing for the next 2 hours though when i was sitting in the car and he was carrying all of his and my tackle from the stones pegs, through the swamp and up the steep hill back to the old car park at the top! next, a 3 hour wait in enniskillen hospital with a cloth over my parts. the nurse was in stitches when she saw what had happened, and due to the large gulps of paddy whisky i had in the car, i laughed along with her. she removed the trebles by pushing the points further through my sack and cutting them off with pliers. then it was the old tetanus jab in the ar$e and a painful ride back to belturbet, where i sat in the cosy all night getting very drunk and being laughed at by every angler that come through the door after phil told them what had happened. embarrasing or what?