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  • Vaseline

    Joe wanted to buy a motorbike. He doesn't have much luck until, one day;
    he comes across a Harley with a 'For Sale' sign on it.

    The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old.
    It is shiny and in absolute mint condition. He immediately buys it, and
    asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years.
    'Well, it's quite simple, really,' says the seller, 'whenever the bike
    is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It
    protects it from the rain.' And he hands Joe a huge jar of Vaseline.

    That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her
    parents. Naturally, they take the bike there. But just before they
    enter the
    house, Sandra stops him and says, 'I have to tell you something about
    my family before we go in.'
    'When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who says
    anything during dinner has to do the dishes.' 'No problem,' he says.
    And in they go.

    Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge
    stack of dirty dishes.
    In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs,
    in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes.

    They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word. As dinner
    progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation. So he leans
    over and kisses Sandra. No one says a word.
    So he reaches over and fondles her breasts.

    Still, nobody says a word. So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes
    off, throws her on the table, and screws her right there, in front of
    her parents.

    His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and
    her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.

    He looks at her mom. 'She's got a great body,' he thinks. So he grabs
    the mom, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every
    which way, right there on the dinner table.

    Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total

    All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain.

    Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket.

    Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts,

    'All right, that's enough, I'll do the dishes!'
    Simon Young
    Talk Angling UK fishing chat and tackle
    web design Doncaster - Limitless Digital